We’ve witness the propagation of the creature known as the helicopter parent – doting care givers that just can’t stay out of their children’s business. Whether it’s meticulously scheduling their kids time, cyber-stalking summer camp antics or getting over involved with older kids job hunting, these alpha parents take child rearing to obsessive new levels.
Lisa Belkin at The New York Times has a smart view of the situation. She views this parenting style as part of a logical cycle where the previous generation’s faults fuels and defines the current generation’s style. And to the relief of kids, teachers and potential employers everywhere, she sees the “slacker parent” on the rise.
Parenting is generational. The Boomers (now in their 50s and 60s) were busy blazing trails and making money. So Gen X (now in their 30s and 40s) went a little overboard to make up for the attention they didn’t get from parents who were never home. (Or, at least, they thought that’s what they were doing. That created a new kind of stress in the process has become all too clear.)
Now enter Gen Y. The oldest of them are in their late 20s, and are just starting to have children. Like every generation they will aim to do exactly the opposite of what their parents did. And while there are certainly still “Alpha Moms” out there, the women who proudly see themselves as “Slacker Moms” are apparently growing.
…I predict the ascendancy of the Slacker parent over the next few years. Alpha parenting is not only tiring, it is can backfire, raising what some call the T-Ball generation, where everyone swings until they get a hit, everyone gets a trophy, and no one learns what it means to be disappointed. (Gen Y knows the risks well; they are that generation.) The economy will also help to tamp down the Alpha Moms in the near future (a speck of a silver lining).
New York Times: “America and the Alpha Mom”
(image by Greg Williams)
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There’s a false assumption here, the helicopter parents aren’t Gen X, they’re the tail end of the boomers. Gen Xers are more likely to be laid back in their parenting and realize that kids need to stand on their own. Most of the Xers I know are recent parents and don’t get the frenzy with which the boomers have treated their kids like delicate flowers. To be honest, I think we’re in store for a generation of sane 30 something parents followed by another generation of parents who want all kids to have a trophy again.
October 21st, 2008 at 2:00 pm