Curry is a favorite dish in the UK, so growing chickpeas and spices locally would help keep up with demand and reduce the impact from importing the items.
In a bold move to make the United Kingdom a more sustainable society and to ensure that the only edible food across the pond is grown locally, the coalition government has suggested that farming in Britain focuses on growing local curry ingredients. The Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs (Defra, an acronym, not a curry ingredient), after extensive study, has decided that the domestic cultivation of curry ingredients would lead to enhanced consumer food literacy and improved waste reduction behaviors.
The report’s conclusions are sure to confuse British farmers, many of whom only three weeks before the Olympics’ opening ceremony have been tasked with raising chickens for the Olympiad’s McDonald’s locationsthat will serve millions of tourists who will not venture into East London to dine at the city’s fine curry establishments. Defra, however, insists that domestically grown curry ingredients will help reduce greenhouse gas emissions, which ignores the fact that the gases emitted after a meal in an East London curry house would occur whether the ingredients were grown locally or not.
Key to this move towards development would be that spices, a key raw material of curry, may only be present in small quantities, but nonetheless add “to the environmental burden of the dish and reliance on imported ingredients.” One Defra employee interviewed for this article under the condition that he remain unnamed, however, said that an internal analysis of turmeric cultivation revealed the annual amount of carbon emissions that would be reduced due to domestic production of this important spice would equal the carbon footprint of the hat Princess Beatrice wore at last year’s royal wedding. Still another Defra analyst, furious about her colleague’s leak, insisted this employee was just upset because his words in section 2.9 of the Green Food Project Curry Sub Group Report, which originally stated that “curry (including side dishes) tastes very good,” were replaced with the more scientifically accurate statement that “curry (including side dishes) has a variable composition.”
Originally published on Triple Pundit, republished with kind permission.