Addicted to Your Phone? The NoPhone Is Here to Help
The NoPhone Zero is the latest smartphone-sized piece of plastic designed to help users combat technology addiction
The world’s most technologically regressive phone has received its latest update: an even more minimal, smartphone-shaped piece of plastic, dubbed the NoPhone Zero. Priced at just $5, the phone boasts absolutely zero features. It has even stripped away the logo and button indentations of the classic NoPhone.
The NoPhone Zero is designed to mimic the sensation of a smartphone device in your hand, without any of an actual phone’s distracting features (such as Wi-Fi, push notifications, Instagram, tweets, texts, emojis, or the ability to make phone calls) in lieu of forcing users to engage with the physical world around them.
According to NoPhone’s Senior Vice President, Chris Sheldon, “the NoPhone Zero is the closest a NoPhone has ever become to nothing at all.”
The NoPhone ZERO has no 3D touch screen, no 4K video camera and no metallic rose-gold exterior. With no fake buttons and no fake camera, the NoPhone ZERO is without a doubt the least advanced NoPhone ever created by mankind. Just like the original NoPhone, the NoPhone ZERO is designed to reduce smartphone addiction.
The more accessible price point and the even fewer features might have finally pushed tempted buyers on the verge of an upgrade to leap into the NoPhone revolution. In less than 48 hours, the NoPhone Zero received full funding on Kickstarter.
But how will technology addicts handle the transition to a life with a piece of plastic? NoPhone suggests thoughtful hacks such as holding the NoPhone in your hand while engaging in an actual conversation, using eye contact, smiles and empathetic nodding, and even attending a concert with the NoPhone in your back pocket, with your attention free to focus on the performance of the band.
Testimonies show that NoPhone users are thrilled with the device. Customer Andra J raved: I can now eat food without taking photos of it. Thanks, NoPhone!”
If the original NoPhone and the NoPhone Zero don’t quite serve your needs of going technology free, consider the company’s NoPhone Selfie (featuring a stick-on selfie mirror), or wait for the company’s next groundbreaking device: a full sized NoTablet device.